What is a Ukrainian “Politodoodler”? Arguments against a new coup were arguments against the old one! Plus the case for a new one…

Portrait of a Ukrainian politodoodler, Yuri Romanenko

Alexander RODGERS
In News Front, November 30, 2015

Translated from Russian by Tom Winter

You ask me:

What’s a Ukrainian politodoodler?

And I answer:

Ukrainian politodoodler: Noun. Person who, in Field of Dreams, can guess all the letters, but can’t read the words.

And now I will give you an example. My favorite patient in the psychiatric ward, Yuri Romanenko, has come out with a new text “How a spontaneous popular uprising against Porochenko would turn out.” If you leave out the fillers, he gets pretty scary about the consequences of such a coup: 

— They won’t extend any more credit;

— Kiev will not be able to guarantee the transit of gas to the EC;

— Some of the oligarchs will run away and block the operation of their companies;

— A new junta will not be able to control all the regions;

— Unemployment will rise;

— Local elites will strengthen regional separatism;

— We’ll get a war of “everybody against everybody;”

You’ve just got to ask one question: sonny boy, why didn’t you write this before the Euromaidan?

Indeed, back then my arguments against the coup were just these, plus the loss of Russian markets,  plus the loss of Russian contracts, plus the loss of cheap Russian credit, (under 5% compared to 7.25-7.5% in the west) plus the transition to external US control.

Back then, Poroshenko gave you $100 to write in favor of Maidan, but has he now given you $100 to write against a Maidan?

Another key question: Why does external American control suit Mr Romanenko, but external Russian (which built up all the now-dying scientific and industrial base in Ukraine) does not?

Everything is already pretty clear, but let’s go through his arguments against the overthrow of Poroshenko one more time:

— They won’t extend any more credit;

— Kiev will not be able to guarantee the transit of gas to the EC (The terrorists who can blow up power lines to Crimea with impunity will alike be able to blow up pipelines with impunity; there’s no controlling them.)

— Part of the oligarchs (including the “patriotic” ones that would support the next Maidan)  have already run off, and their enterprizes are at a standstill.

The current junta already cannot control the regions;

 — unemployment is worsening so fast, that the number has come to 100,000 more each month;

feudalistic fragmentation under the control of local elites is happening — only ones not seeing it are blind.

war of “everybody against everybody” has been ongoing for quite some time.

But now, my arguments for a new, anti-western coup:

— It will be possible to put a stop to the madness and greed of the current juntists;

— It will be possible to begin restoring normal relations with Russia;

— It will be possible to shed all the “Heroes,” and “Patriots” since their outrageousness has gone beyond all limits.

— It will be possible to put an end to the civil war (even if it means expelling the “Svidomiy” to Canada or Poland);

— There will be something of truth in the MSM;

— Those actually guilty in the Institute and Odessa Trade Unions building massacres would finally come to justice;

— Normal professionals could (yes, this is potential) come to power instead of foreign carpetbaggers;

— It will be possible to leave that part of the debt encumbered by the preceding junta;

The country will get rid of the external American control that is deliberately leading her to the abyss.

You could add a lot more things, but this is enough! Burn, Mustapha!*

P.S. Or let’s just tell the truth: No American cookies, No Maidan.

— Alexander Rodgers, exclusive for News Front


*A reader in the comments below informs me that this would be  Mustapha Nayyem, an MP with Poroshenko’s party. My thanks to Enriqueferro –tr.

Alexander Rodgerspolitodoodler
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